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Hello All!
Aug. 12th, 2008 05:50 pm![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
immortal-jedi.livejournal.comDue to real life, I faded away from the internet in 2003- early 2004, and completely forgot about everything related to the PPC.
Recently,
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lady_rilwin, who is on my friendslist, posted a PPC story. I had no idea that the PPC was still running. So, what's been happening in the last 4 to 5 years? Is Bleeprin still a popular remedy for badfic? Does the Sunflower Official still rule?
And I'm sure I'll have more questions once I familiarize myself with the PPC once again.
(Now to see if I still have a link to the boards, if they're still up and running.)
chissbiker.livejournal.comI'm new. I found this via another member here.
Sues run wild in my fandoms, and they must be dealt with. I've seen far too many atrocious fics and Sue characters. The popularity of Sues is quite surprising.
In words of Emperor Palpatine from Star Wars, "Show no mercy!"
helenofpylos.livejournal.comSo, mostly I just wanted to say hi and stop lurking. I haven't laughed this hard since the first time I watched Life of Brian. Thanks for that!
Yours in PPC solidarity,
Helen of Pylos (the other Helen; and no I don't know Paris).
New site...
Jun. 15th, 2008 11:07 pmhsavinien.livejournal.com
DMFF - One of the crowd
May. 19th, 2008 06:03 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.com~~~~~
( One of the crowd )
DMFF - Chosen of a Goddess
May. 19th, 2008 05:59 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.com[Additional note: In this story, the names of the characters rendered Lymnasta and Alystan are restored. The second 'a' in both names is a lost, accented vowel, assumed here to be an a. ~Huinesoron]
~~~~~
( Chosen of a Goddess )
Request for a scouting mission
May. 18th, 2008 11:40 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ramblin_rosieSO
Does anyone know of any other ridiculously bad pairings that have already shown up or that you think we can anticipate?
Thanks in advance!
A whole new breed of PPC plug
May. 10th, 2008 04:35 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.comGeneric Surface
The PPC's very first webcomic!
Yes, using the height of Lego technology, you too can now gain a glimpse of the visual marvel that is PPC HQ! Or, well, for now you can gain a glimpse of the visual marvel that is hS talking to the camera, but soon, soon--!
Anyway, yeah. It's on Livejournal, so you can friend it and see a nice, condensed post with only a couple of LJ tags on your friends list. Or you can just visit it like you would any other website -- everything's public. But I hope you enjoy it... it was at least marginally hard work putting it all together.
(Simultaneous cross-post to the PPC Board, PPC community, and my own LJ)
DMFF - Baneful Melody
May. 4th, 2008 11:56 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.com~~~~~
( Baneful Melody )
DMFF - The Earthborn: Guardian of time
May. 4th, 2008 11:54 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.com~~~~~
( The Earthborn: Guardian of time )
huinesoron.livejournal.comSo that's what I'm doing. This page is the DMFF front page, and the links link to all the recovered missions. Unfortunately I was unable to salvage a copy of I'll be the One -- if anyone does have this, please let me know. Also, I should note that some of the punctuation in the original 'fics has been rendered by time as a bunch of little squares. I've edited these back as best I can, but all accents have been lost, and there might be some mistakes. My apologies.
~
huinesoron]~~~~~
Welcome to the DMFF.
This Department of the PPC was set up at the time when I read a particularly bad LotR fic containing various creatures that did not belong in Middle-earth. I'm quite the purist, and the story mortally terrified me. Fortunately it was removed from the web. My career as an agent stranded for a while, and I returned to doing other useful things. Until recently a good idea popped into my mind and I found another terrible fic. There was no special department for the destroying of unicorns etc, so the DMFF was born. Here I will post every fic I come across and is so bad that I bother to PPC it. I'd appreciate criticism, I'll laugh at flames. If you think I should do a particular fic, or if you want to contact me for any reason whatsoever, feel free to do so. I also recommend that you read the Original Series, it might help to understand what the PPC really is.
The stories:
Baneful Melody - Horror at Middle-earth's newest creature: a nymph with WINGS.
I'll be the One [Not recovered. ~hS] - Mel and Joe argue like a married couple as they hunt down a unicorn. Yes, it's bad. For you, Bodldops!
The Earthborn: Guardian of time - Bush- and Westlife-mocking whilst chasing the worst Sue ever; misplaced flora and fauna combined.
Chosen of a Goddess - Two Sues in a crossover: chaos enSUES. Joe is stuck with two other agents and two goddesses. More chaos.
One of the crowd - A sylph-Sue with bad grammar, and a recruit doing Assassin's Exam.
Daughter of the Rings - The Diabolical Smurf-Sue of Doom rapes canon, and Joe suffers from UnCanon Infection. (long)
DISCLAIMER: I do not own The Lord of the Rings, neither book nor movies. It all belongs to respectively either Tolkien Enterprises or NewLine Productions. I do not own the PPC either, the idea belongs to Jay and Acacia. This is merely a spinoff. They also own Headquarters, Upstairs, the Sunflower Official, the Department of Mary Sues, the Department of Bad Slash, and in short all of the original PPC. This spinoff, though, belongs to ME, as do Mel, Joe, the Waterlily Commander and Bormir. Endomiel belongs to herself, Eru be thanked, as does Ril-Gania. The images displayed on this website are MINE. I made them, so don't take them unless you have my permission. I am not making money out of writing this in any way, so suing me would be pointless. Thank you.
~~~~~
[Editor's additional disclaimer: I do not claim any right or responsibility towards any DMFF material; these are the sole property of Elvea Aure, and are only archived here because they seem to have been otherwise lost. ~hS]
Recorded here for posterity.
May. 1st, 2008 07:59 pmhuinesoron.livejournal.com~~~~
The Agent looked around her nearly empty response center—only one large duffel bag lay on the floor, with a few assorted weapons from various fandoms lying on top of it.
How long had it been for her? Nearly ten years, if she was remembering correctly. She had been ten when recruited, and had lived through some of the most harrowing moments of the PPC—betrayals, wars, friends coming and leaving, and had come to find that the world of the PPC was passing her by. Few people even remembered that there was a response center #6666 anymore, and even less knew that the Department of Author Correspondence was still active.
Well, it had been, in its own way. There had been brief stints of fieldwork, but most of the job was simply talking to authors, the ones who just needed a little nudge in the right direction. For the past several years, it had only taken one Agent, sadly, to deal with the stories that fell into the aforementioned category. Now, this final Agent was retiring.
Agent Ella Darcy, age 19 by now, took a deep breath and tried to control the tears that were welling up in her eyes. She’d done a first year of college by correspondence (ironically enough), but was planning on finishing it in person, and making her way in the Real World.
She lay her CAD and RAD—still older models, since she rarely used them—on the desk, along with the mini-replicator that had been so useful to her over the years. Really, she’d always wondered why they’d never caught on.
With a last look around the room, she shouldered the duffel bag and distributed the weapons on her person. Ella walked into the hallway, closing the door behind her.
Inside the room, the computer let out a single, mournful beep.
She wandered aimlessly through the corridors until she reached the office of the Sunflower Official.
"I’m leaving, now. I’m portalling back to the Real World. If anything catastrophic happens here... well, there are better people for you to pull out of retirement, but I don’t suppose I’ll disappear from the Agent records," she said simply.
The SO nodded, as best as he could. Thank you for not asking about a pension. Still, it’s unfortunate that someone who understands how things work around here must leave.
Ella smiled. “You love telling people they can’t have a raise. Who am I to rob you of that joy?”
True. Good luck, Agent Ella Darcy.
With that, she left the office, meandering until she reached a rather unassuming looking door, labeled only as "Outside."
She walked through.
A newcomer...
Apr. 7th, 2008 07:53 pmlady-rilwen.livejournal.com-pokes head in gingerly-
Hello, I'm very new here...I found the PPC via a mission report someone showed me, read whatever other mission reports I could find, and now want to join in and help.
I'm part of a number of fandoms, and have seen Sue depredations upon most of them. I offer my somewhat bloodthirsty aid to wherever I might be useful.
...Oh, and I tried the actual message board, and can't seem to log in there.
-waves a small 'Death to BadFic' flag-
elluminai.livejournal.comI just wanted to let you know, there is a chatroom up for The PPC and other works. Unfortunately, it is for kids 14-19.
If someone could make another chatroom for regular PPC people then I'd be happy, but for now there is this little ditty.
Membership to the site is free and takes only a second.
http://xat.com/PPCandotherMSTgroups
just click or cut and paste that link, you may get a warning signal asking for membership, re-paste the link if you lose the page and you may call me the Guru of the Obvious for the previous remark.
Thank you for reading and, if you join, see you there!
Ell-the-nut.
New agents
Mar. 14th, 2008 01:19 pmizzet_engineerGive up, mate. They can't hear you.
Hello? We...um...we thought we should probably introduce ourselves, seeing as we haven't ventured out of the RC yet.
Before you say anything, I honestly didn't know the whisky would be that strong.
Anyway, I'm Archer - William Archer technically, but just 'Archer' is fine - and this is my partner...
Who can speak for himself. Agent Sabbat, at your service.
Hang on a minute. I told them my first name, so...
So what?
So you ought to do the same.
No-one cares what my first name is.
It's polite. As I was saying, this is my partner, Ra-
*scuffling sounds, and a cry of pain*
Sorry about that. You can find our missions, when we actually have any, here, and you can find our profiles on the wiki-thingy here and here. Alright, that should be enough to be getting on with. Now, how do you shut this Godsdamned thing off?
A challenge!
Jan. 28th, 2008 11:53 amramblin_rosiesurgicalsteel is planning to write an essay about medical implausibilities in badfic as a reference tool for LOTR fic writers. She's taking suggestions here. (I think it might be wise to compile a sort of FAQ with references for her so that she doesn't have to sort through the entire workload of all the LOTR agents past and present.)If you want to know where she'll be coming from, her just-completed magnum opus "The King's Surgeon" is here (rated R for medically graphic material, occasional strong language, and occasional sexual references). It's 124 chapters with the A/N, so you might not want to read the whole thing in one go....
